Read This!: The Bronze Horseman

By Paullina Simons

Book challenge:  Book over 700 pages

This book (and its subsequent two books because it’s a trilogy) have been all over the book boards.  Everyone LOVES The Bronze Horseman so I decided to buy it.

I have a lot to say so, while I will try to make my review shorter than its 800 pages, I will break this review into two parts:  The non-spoiler and spoiler reviews.


Summary

The Bronze Horseman starts with the entrance of the USSR into World War II in June 1941.

Tatiana lives in Leningrad with her family and meets Alexander, an officer in the Red Army.   The two soon fall in love.  But, with Germany’s siege of Leningrad and no supplies able to get in, Tatiana, Alexander, and all of Leningrad must struggle through the long winter dealing with constant bombings and almost no food.  In the midst of their fight for survival, Tatiana must deal with her feelings for Alexander and her desire not to betray her beloved sister. 

Non-Spoiler

I had some major eye-roll and side-eye moments as I read this (see the spoiler review) but all in all, it wasn’t terrible.  In fact, I actually got pretty in to this book and had a hard time putting it down because it very easy to read and I wanted to know what was going to happen.  But, I will say that I expected more considering all the acclaim.

Spoiler (or “Things that really annoyed me about this book”)

I am going to break this down by specific topics

The Metric System

From page 342:

Alexander's rations helped them stretch their food supplies a little longer.  He got a king's ration - 800 grams of bread per day!- more than half of what they were getting for the five of them.  He also received 150 grams of meat and 140 of cereals and a half a kilo of vegetables.
  

Throughout the whole long winter, everything is measured in grams.

I am not a scientist.

I am an American.

I don’t use the metric system so I have no idea what this means.  I know a kilogram would be like a pound give or take but after that, 125 grams of bread?  What does that mean?  They could have at least displayed a table to convert or did a footnote that said X number of grams equals 1 slice of bread.  Either way, I got that it wasn’t a lot but still...  And yes I realize that it was more true to the situation to write in the metric system.  But still...

The Soviet Union

After reading this book, I am extremely happy to have been born in capitalistic America and not the USSR.  Yikes!  That is all I can say.



Tatiana’s Learns English

Tatiana never spoke English but yet one phrase book and a couple of conversations later, she is a pro.  Eye roll and side-eye combo.  Of course since Russian and English are so close, I can see how she was able to do it. 

The Dasha Question

One of the most annoying things to me about this book was

Tatiana meets Alexander.

Tatiana finds out that Alexander went on a date or whatever with her sister.

Tatiana knows Dasha likes him.

Tatiana tells Alexander she can’t continue with him because of her sister.

Alexander decides he can’t be without Tatiana so he decides to continue dating Dasha to the point where they become engaged.  His justification: “I need to be near you”.  Uh ok. I would have a major problem if Mr. one day said, “Hey I am with you so I can be near your sister.”  Um yeah.  This is a good idea how? This just seemed so dumb to me, I don’t even have words.  It’s fortunate the war came and everyone got killed off I guess or how was this supposed to resolve itself otherwise?

Alexander is a selfish, douche.

That is all.

Alexander is always able to get away from the front to attend to Tatiana.

I am positive this is how it would happen in real life Soviet Russia.  Please.


The Honeymoon


I am going to cover a few things here.

1.  Simons constantly refers to the fact that Tatiana is "so small" and Alexander is "so big".  Please.  Cliche train!

2. Alexander is whoring around town using Tatiana's sister but expects her (Tatiana) to "save herself" for  him and gets mad at the idea of her even hanging out with other men.  Uh ok.

3.  So we've established that Tatiana is this meek, little woman and Alexander this experienced, big man whore.  Let's go to their honeymoon.

From about 520 to 630, the story became a torrid romance novel.

Every three second, these two were at it like rabbits.

For example:

"Tatiana those are some nice pancakes you are making..."

Sex scene

Five minutes later in the story, "Oh Alexander, that is a big fish you caught..."

Sex scene

"What time is it..."

Sex scene

You get the idea.

It got old pretty fast.  I stuck through the 100 pages of this but it could have really been edited down.  Frankly, I thought the whole thing was unrealistic and absurd.

I read Mr. some of these scenes because they were so ridiculous and he said "It sounds like a desperate housewife wrote that as some kind of fantasy".   

Cakey Choco Chip Cookies

The March edition of Food Network Magazine was devoted to chocolate.  I dog-eared nearly every page and decided that my first recipe to try would be these cakey chocolate chip cookies.

I wasn't sure these would be blog-worthy because I figured eh, they are just chocolate chip cookies but since everything is always an adventure, here goes:

I stuck to the recipe as is with the following exceptions:

1.  I missed the part where you are supposed to put in room temperature eggs.  I know you are supposed to do this when baking as a general rule but I usually just use the eggs straight from my fridge.

2.  I always use room temperature butter.  Alas, when I went to put the butter in, the recipe says to use cold butter.  Oops.  I stuck it in the freezer for a bit to get it colder.  

3.  I used salted butter.

4.  Our baking soda expired in March.  Also, an oops.  But, I figured that was a month ago, how bad could it be?

5.  Extra chocolate chips could have been added.

The recipe instructs you to make these 2 1/2 inches across.  I was like really?  But it said you are supposed to get 12 cookies so I made 12 even-sized balls of dough.

They were very large.

So, usually when I bake, I use my silicon mat things.  Sometimes I use parchment paper but usually only when I am cooking a lot of cookies at one time.  This recipe said parchment paper so, trying to follow the recipe, I used that instead.  Not being particularly careful about how much was on each tray.

Cookies go into the oven.

I started to smell something burning but figured it was probably just goo in our stove that was burning off.  I ignored it.

Mr. yells from upstairs "Is something burning???!!!!"

Me: "Eh it is just the cookies baking."

Mr.: "I think something is burning."

Me: "Fine."

Sigh...  Putting my book down...   Going into the kitchen....  Opening the oven door....

AHHHHHHHHHH

The parchment paper was all on fire!!!!!  AHHHHHH!!!!!!  

Now, I had a momentary "OMG I used wax paper instead!" palpitation.

But no, the parchment paper was what I used.   And on the side of the box "Great for baking!!!"

I am guessing somehow the overlap of the parchment paper that was hanging off the trays touched something which resulted in it being set on fire.  I have used said parchment paper before in large amounts hanging off the edge of cookie sheets with no issue in the past.  I have no idea what happened.

Either way, I pulled the trays with the paper on fire out of the stove and attempted to put out the flames:

Sigh...


I pulled out my other cookie sheets and used my silicons to finish them off for the rest of the cooking time.

I sliced off the ashy parts of all of the cookies before putting them back in the oven.

We are still finding parchment ash in our kitchen.

Either way, the second attempt at cooking finished successfully:

These cookies are very big.  It is a lot to eat at once although they are decent.   However, I am not sure I would make them again as I still prefer Toll House.

Our 5th!!!! Anniversary

Happy anniversary to us!!! In honor of our five years of marriage, here are five of our favorite quotes from our wedding video:


Pre-ceremony

Mr. to Mr. Sr.: You can't use your flash during the ceremony.
Mr. Sr.: But every camera has a flash.
Mr.: You can turn the flash off.
Mr. Sr.: I don't think you can on this one.
Mr.: Then don't take pictures.  That's why we hired the professional photographer.




After the ceremony:

Mr. Sr. to Mr.: "Did you know about the bagpiper?"

No, we had no idea that a bagpiper would show up at our wedding.  :P




During pictures:


Me to Mr.: "It was funny.  I was actually just talking about [looks at camera] ummm...  I'll tell you later."

Nothing like a good gossip fest being immortalized.






Post-pictures:


Groomsman F to Bro: "The announcer said, 'Morgantown is going to be on fire tonight.'  They got in trouble for saying that."

Most random quote of the day.




During the reception:


Our DJ: "Now that everyone has their paper hats on...  I guess we can begin dinner."

Because everyone at our wedding was given a paper triangular hat made by my family and was wearing it while they were seated for dinner.  

Nobody's Fool

If you’re thinking “Another book review?!”, well you should blame Mrs. since she reads about 4-5 books for every one I read.  But the good news is that I’m going to do my best to condense all of my book review posts going forward.

In Richard Russo’s Nobody’s Fool, Donald “Sully” Sullivan is his own worst enemy.  Now in his early 60’s, Sully lacks ambition, finds himself out of work from his construction job, and spends much of his time insulting others and getting himself in trouble.  Stuck in a dying town in upstate New York, Sully is divorced, having a long time affair with a married woman, and trying to get permanent disability payments for a knee injury he suffered.  When his college professor son Peter returns home with news that he’s lost his job and on the verge of divorce, Sully is suddenly forced to confront his past, his failure as a parent, and the memory of his deceased father, a violent drunk.  Peter begins to take an interest in his estranged father and Sully is faced with the idea of forgiveness and has to decide if he is willing to make some changes in his life.

This was my third Russo novel, and I would put it smack dab in the middle.  It’s not nearly as great as the wonderful Empire Falls, but it’s better than the less than stellar That Old Cape Magic.  Interestingly, you can see a lot of parallels between Nobody’s Fool and Empire Falls, almost as if Russo was honing his skills on this earlier novel.  Sully shares many similarities to Miles Roby from Empire Falls, including a connection to an older woman (in this case Sully’s landlord Miss Beryl), an ex-wife, a dead end job in a decaying town, and a nemesis that he went to high school with in that small town.  There’s not very much plot in Nobody’s Fool; it’s more of a sketch of the town and Sully’s life in particular, but what makes the novel worth reading is the many cleverly drawn characters.  From Sully to his dimwitted friend Rub to Sully's former employer, the womanizing Carl Roebuck, and from diner owner Hattie to Miss Beryl and her conversations with her deceased husband's picture and the African mask on her wall, the novel is surprisingly full of laughs (even if it’s dry humor for the most part).  The book won’t go on any top ten list of mine, but it’s worth picking up as a good way to pass the time.

Next Up:  Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte

Read This!: The Woman in Black

By Susan Hill

I picked up this book because it seemed like it would have a nice, suspenseful feeling.  I don’t mind a good ghost story as long as it is not too, too scary.  I like a thrill, not not sleeping for a week.

The Woman in Black is told in the first person by Arthur Kipps, a solicitor, who at the age of 23, was sent to take care of the estate of his now-deceased client, Mrs. Drablow.   Kipps travels to the town of Crythin Gifford where he starts to sense that the locals are hiding something regarding the house of Mrs. Drablow and a mysterious woman in black who he keeps seeing.  Full of youth and naivety, Kipps ignores the hints and decides to stay at the remote Eel Marsh House alone, except for a dog.  Soon, Kipps starts to understand why the locals all stay away as his experiences at the house become more and more frightening.

For the majority of the book, I thought the story was intriguing but not quite scary and was a bit disappointed.  Then, I got to the end.  And I have to say at the time, I wasn’t super impressed but the more I thought about it afterwards, the more it bothered me.  So I guess in the end, Susan Hill was successful in her ghost story.

The only part of the book that really annoyed me was the fact that I couldn’t place what time the book was supposed to be taking place.  It was written in 1983 but was not set in 1983.  I thought it was set in Victorian England but then they talked about motor cards and lights so I am guessing it’s later.  I found this really frustrating.

I also wondered how much Mrs. Drablow herself experienced at the house and wished that would have been explained.

I will also say, in closing, that this book was recently made into a movie.  I would like to see the movie because I think a lot of the spookiness would be better conveyed through sound and visual.  

Read This!: The Almost Moon

Book challenge: Book that you’ve been avoiding

By Alice Sebold

Many years ago, when it first came out, I read The Lovely Bones cover to cover, non-stop.  As a result, when I learned that Alice Sebold had released a new book, The Almost Moon, I asked for and received it for Christmas without actually knowing what it was about.  Because I had asked for it, Greeney thought she would read it and did.  Alas, her review was not very good.  After telling me some things regarding the story and how dark and disturbing she found it to be, I decided to put off reading it…   For years…  Until last week.  This is why it counts as the book I have been avoiding for the book challenge.

The Almost Moon, told in first person by Helen Knightly, recounts how she murdered her mentally ill mother and her life for the 24 hours afterwards.  Throughout the story, we get flashbacks that depict her life with her mother, her mentally ill father, her ex-husband, etc. that “set the stage” so to speak for what is to come. 

The story is definitely dark and disturbing but maybe not so much as I was preparing myself for. 

Alice Sebold, I think, is a gifted writer.  Even though this won’t make my 100 Books to Read before You Die list, I found it hard to put it down.

Happy Easter!

Mad Men & Other TV Notes

I only have a few (late) comments on this week's Mad Men:

First, Roger continued to be the king of one-liners and of course lord of inappropriateness. What was Roger’s most offensive comment:

1) Referring to Don’s new secretary as “it’s always darkest before the Dawn?”
2) Commenting to Peggy about Michael, the new copywriter, “everyone has one these days”?
3) Or saying in response to Don’s news about Betty’s illness, “well that would solve a lot of problems”?

Oh, Roger.

This week’s episode seems to have had two divisive issues that I’ll address:

First is what I’ll refer to as the Michael Ginsberg issue. For whatever reasons, in many of the comments I’ve read people sure do hate the new Jewish copywriter. For my part I think he’s got real potential and I enjoyed his scenes with Peggy. I envision the two of them having some fun (and not so fun) conflicts. The main criticism seems to be that his personality was over the top and possibly playing into a stereotype. But I think that’s the point. He’s acting like one person in the office to impress everyone and stand out, but as we see when he goes home he’s much more reserved. In this respect he’s not unlike Don (who’s not only playing a part at work, his whole life is playing another person) or even Peggy (who’s playing the role she has to in order to succeed in a man’s world). And let’s not forget this is a TV show and you need interesting characters. It’s like complaining that Omar on The Wire is too over the top because his character's not true to life like the rest of the show. But you need Omar to keep it interesting. Anyway, would these people rather have Joey back from last season (or Jane’s cousin for that matter)?

The second is the Betty issue, or more appropriately the Fat Betty issue. I’ll admit the fat suit may have been a bit much, but it didn’t bother me nearly as much as others based on what I’ve read. Betty has never been a sympathetic character, and she’s not a fan fave, but the hate still surprises me. I think it’s perfectly within her character to let herself go, in some desperate cry for attention. And if she really had a thyroid problem I imagine that would contribute to the weight gain (although I'm not a doctor). My understanding is that we won’t see much Betty this year anyway because of January Jones’ real life pregnancy, so hopefully this isn’t much of an issue.

And that leads me to a comment I read about whether Betty was lying to Henry when she told him the doctor said she was fine (after the phone call). This would have been foreshadowed by her friend who said she would rather have not told her family and then just died one day. On one hand I don’t think this is the case because after the call she went back into the whole “I guess I’m just fat” routine and wolfed down Sally’s ice cream. And they're not going to kill off Betty, right? On the other hand this could be a fascinating plot line throughout the season, and it’s not like the show to raise an issue in one episode and have it resolved by the end of that episode. Along the same lines, going back to the premiere, I’m not sure we’ve seen the last of the owner of the wallet that Lane found. Could that be like Don meeting Connie in Season 3 at Roger’s country club party? Who might the mysterious wallet man be and what can he do for the firm or just for Lane? And I’m still wondering where Faye is, or have we seen the last or her, like we apparently have Sal? Is she going to be like Midge and pop up in another season or disappear like Sally’s teacher that Don had an affair with?

A few other TV notes:

Sunday has suddenly become a busy TV night in our household. In addition to Mad Men, Mrs. and I have also been watching Frozen Planet on Discovery. From the makers of Planet Earth and Blue Planet (the former we both enjoyed and although we haven’t seen the latter I’m sure we’d love that as well), it’s a documentary on life in the Artic and Antarctic regions starring penguins, whales, wolves, bison, polar bears and more. If you’re into nature shows we highly recommend checking it out.

Also Sunday nights, immediately preceding Mad Men, The Killing is back for Season 2. Even though we both wanted to quit the show after last season’s disappointing finale, we couldn’t help ourselves and ended up watching the two-hour premiere. It was ok at best, pretty much what you’d expect given what’s happened on the show so far. We’ll probably keep watching (although likely On Demand on some other night when there's nothing else on we want to watch), but I can’t escape the feeling that there is virtually no chance the show comes to a satisfying conclusion. It seems like no matter what happens it will be a let down, and that’s too bad for a show that had a ton of potential.

And one more Sunday show, Season 8 of Food Network Star premieres Sunday, May 13th. We’ll probably make this an addition to the watch list. On a related note, we’ve watched Jeff Mauro’s show (the Season 7 winner) a few times, and although I wasn’t initially on the Jeff bandwagon like Mrs., I have to admit the man has personality and does make a mean sandwich. He’s welcome to come prepare lunch for us anytime.

And last but not least, Hulu is once again having its “Best in Show” contest. It's been going on for weeks, but it’s now down to the final two – Community vs. The Walking Dead. They've each taken down some formidable competition to get to the finals. I’m obviously all for the Community victory and I'm hoping a big win might even convince NBC to renew the show (fingers crossed). So go to hulu.com/bestinshow and vote.

Read This!: Georgiana: Duchess of Devonshire

Book challenge:  Book with pictures

By Amanda Foreman

I bought Georgiana: Duchess of Devonshire during the big Borders blow out sale.  It was definitely an impulse buy and I put off reading it until now.  I just didn’t want to get bogged down in another biography.  But alas, I am getting low on books and decided to jump in.

Born Lady Georgiana Spencer and married in her teens to the Duke of Devonshire, Georgiana Cavendish was thrust into a life of fame and fashion.  She was the head of high society in late 18^th century England and intricately involved in the lives of the English and French elite as well as politics of the time (She was a major Whig party member).  In her personal life, Georgiana was the mother of four children, one illegitimate, and a compulsive gambler losing what would have been millions of dollars in today’s money.  The most unusual part of her life was her relationship with Lady Elizabeth Foster (Bess).  Best friend or lover, history can’t say.  But, what is known is that Bess (a bit of a schemer), Georgiana, and the Duke lived together in a sort of ménage-à-trois for many years. (Bess had two illegitimate children by the Duke).  When Georgiana died, Bess married the Duke and realized her life-long dream of taking her friend’s place (much to the Cavendishs’ dismay).

There were a lot of juicy details in this book and excerpts from letters.  However, personally, I found all of the political mumbo jumbo boring and my eyes glazed over.  I know that sometimes in biographies details must be explained but I thought they were a bit much here and I just wanted to go back to her personal life which was much more intriguing. 

I will say that I judged Georgiana a bit on the gambling.  It was a bit shocking how much money she was wasting. Yes, I gave more than an ample share of my allowance to Instant Bingo at the church fair as a kid but at least I knew when to stop.

I will also say I was surprised at how many of the ton were having affairs and illegitimate children.  That is not the picture one necessarily sees. At least not of the women.

Last but not least, I want to comment on the movie The Duchess which I saw a few years ago and is the screen version of this biography.  In The Duchess, Georgiana was made out to be more of a victim of both her husband and his relationship with Bess.  In the movie, the Duke is painted as a much more brutal, uncaring jerk than he is in the book where, while emotionally distant from Georgiana (it was not a love-match), he was never the cruel man he appeared in the movie.  And yes, in both, he did ask Georgiana to give up her illegitimate daughter but she was in agreement due to the scandal it would create.

Fun fact: The Duchess was an ancestral aunt to Princess Diana.

Irish Stew

If you'll recall, I was going to make Irish Stew for St. Patrick's Day but with the summer like temps, I decided not to.  This weekend, however, I dove in using this recipe from Martha Stewart.

I used the low-sodium chicken stock and beef instead of lamb.

All in all, it wasn't bad.  We got two meals out of it adding some rolls for dipping.

Mr. felt the broth was more soup than stew but I thought it was just fine.

The only downside in the whole business was that I took off a nice chunk of my finger nail when I tried to peel the potatoes.  Sigh...

And I also realized, I don't care much for thyme.

Possum Pancakes?

Today Mr. and I went to brunch.  On reading the specials menu, we saw this:

I told Mr. to take a picture so we could document and so that I could blog about this later, about where the heck do we live?  Then, Mr. and I had a conversation about who would in fact order this?

Once we got home and after telling Mr. my usual "I'm pregnant!" April fool's joke, I went upstairs...  When the thought occurred to me that the Possum Pancakes were in fact an April's fool's joke...  Mr. LOL'ed when I told him and we realized that, yes, they got us.